Recently something happened that made me stay off Facebook for quite a few days. I'm not going to go into what actually happened because it's not important. But someone posted something that upset me. The person in question is a lovely person and it was in no way directed at me. It's just a sensitive subject and she probably didn't even think about the fact I might see it. My reaction was silly. Instead of deleting my Facebook, an idea I have been flirting with for ages, I deleted the friend (if you're reading this I'm sorry). Which was pretty horrible. And the next day I really regretted it. Not because the large glass of Merlot made me do it (it didn't) but because:
Facebook is an evil cult and must be destroyed
So why don't I just leave Facebook? Isn't that the million dollar question? And the answer is: I don't know. I bang on about needing to keep it for my Mum. She lives in Cyprus and I know she genuinely loves sifting through all the new photos I post of Ava and me and my sister. And I do admit that Facebook can be a fabulous thing for keeping a connection with loved ones so far away. But is that the only reason I don't leave? I don't think so.
For a start, parents on Facebook are a pain in the arse. Suddenly your statuses and timelines have to be vetted constantly for fear of something bad getting back to your parents. That's after the constant pretending you haven't seen their friend request until the point comes where you can't make excuses any more and actually have to accept it. I remember one lovely friend posting something on my timeline about us using recreational drugs. It was a joke. And wasn't true. But I still remember panicking that my Mum wouldn't get it and deleting it quick smart before she was on the blower booking me into the nearest Betty Ford Clinic.
Then there's the Facebook stalking. I'm going to say something here and you probably won't believe me - but I have never really fell foul of the whole FB stalking thing. Yep, I might have had a nosy at an ex's photos through boredom and too much Sauvignon of a night. But literally only ever a couple of times in my life. And if I'm honest I'm far too self-absorbed to really be interested that much in what my ex's are getting up to. Plus I don't see the point in putting yourself through the emotional ringer just to find out if your last bloke's new bird is fatter or skinnier than you are. But I have seen and heard about friends doing it. A lot. And I don't think it's healthy. Not only does is curb the time it takes to heal after a bad break up but it just cannot be good for one's soul. And this is the whole point. I don't think Facebook is good for the soul
There are a thousand other reasons that I could go into as to why I don't like FB. The real question is? Why don't I just bloody leave?
I do have hundreds of photos on there that I would need to export before I could wave goodbye to the site and I can't really be bothered doing it. But it's not a real reason. Is it vanity? Do I need the self-validation of knowing that the photo of Ava looking really cute or the one of me looking uncharacteristically sexy gets 25 likes? Or is it nosiness? Do I just enjoy finding out what's happening in other peoples lives? Sort of like a social media curtain twitcher?
Who knows. But I've been off it a week and feel much better. I haven't read one social status or posted any of my own. And I don't miss it in the slightest. I'm still going to post photos (I have some wedding ones and a pile of pics of Ava for my Mum that I'm going to post on it now) but I've deleted the app on my phone and once the pics are uploaded, I intend on not even looking at how many 'likes' I get.
And you know what - I feel great about it.
Just don't ask me to delete the fucking thing.
6 comments:
I havd been off FB since 30th January 2012 due to the mind games played by my so-called live ones and as a self-confessed FB addict before, I never thought I'd manage but I have to say, for both the mind and soul, it's the BEST thing I've done! You don't have to delete it, just deactivate and if you decide to go back on, it'll all there as you left it - give it a go! :) x
I deleted mine, about a year ago, and then got loads of stick about it from poeple who'd never really spoken to me whilst I was on it. I hadn't been interested in using it anyway.
I briefly reinstated it this year, but I hate the whole thing tbh and deleted it again shortly after as I was victim of some of this unhealthy stalking you mention above. Ick. People need to get a hobby. Facebook isn't a hobby.
Was probably in no way directed at you...more happy to see something grow and be doing well. and just came out a certain way and prob could have been worded better. Person was prob rather drunk while writing it too. :) but yes facebook is evil and I probably won't delete it either. Haha. Xx
I really should have a Facebook free month or something! It's just so hard to give up reading all the pointless status' from people I don't like =/ blaaa how stupid! xx
I've never done the stalking thing either. I have never looked at my Exs because I knew it would upset me, and now I just don't care ebough to look at it at all. Likewise I want to delete it everyday .. but cant! WHY? Argh!
xx
I did the same thing. Got fed up by someone's incessant moaning when actually they have a pretty good life and deleted them. You'd have thought I'd gone to their home and stabbed them in their sleep by the reaction I got! Lesson learned, I now hide the annoying people in my timeline! xx
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